Mother’s Day is coming up! But sometimes it can be hard to know how to help moms of children with special needs and disabilities. All moms need nice gifts and a break. But disability and medical moms need a special treat on a whole different level. Based on a poll, these 6 ideas would be amazing gifts for caregiving moms.
As disability moms, it can be very difficult to take time to care for ourselves, much less treat ourselves. Two factors often prevent us from being able to take even a brief respite break–the inability to find appropriate developmental or medical care for our children and financial strain.
It’s important to keep in mind that it will be necessary to ask first and that it may take some coordination and commitment on your part to pull off these presents. The logistics may sound complicated. They can be, and that’s exactly why these moms have a difficult time doing these things and why it would be such an incredible gift! Some of these ideas are not feasible for everyone. Just remember that the best gift you can give her is offering to help in any way you can.
If you’re a special needs mom, share this post to let others know how they can support you!
#6 Bring a Meal
These moms are very busy and likely tired. Even just saving them the time of cooking one meal or dropping off groceries can brighten their day.
Your gift may allow them the time to take a much-needed break.
Special needs moms might worry about being a burden on you and have a difficult time accepting the gift of your time. If you can phrase it like it wouldn’t be burdening you, they may feel better about taking you up on the offer.
Some things to consider:
- Family members may have food allergies or sensitivities. Many children with special needs are on a specific diet.
- Ask what their family’s favorite meal is.
- Ask if there’s any meal that they don’t like.
- Ask what would be the perfect time to drop off the meal or groceries.
- Unless invited in, just plan on dropping the meal off at the door.
- You can say, “I’m fixing this meal and would like to make double to bring to you. Would that be okay?”
- You can say, “I’m going to the grocery store this afternoon. Can I pick you up some things you need and drop them off?”
#5 Pay for a Cleaning Service
When our daughter, Bethany Grace, came home from the NICU at 3-months-old, it was all we could do to survive and keep her alive. A church member paid for a cleaning service for us for three months. Talk about an amazing gift! Even just one time would have made a tremendous difference.
With therapy and doctors’ appointments, paperwork, phone calls, emails, medical caregiving, managing challenging behaviors, and on and on, laundry and dishes can pile up when medical supplies have to be washed or a child needs intensive attention.
Saving her the time and energy of cleaning and giving her a tidied home could actually help her mental health.
Some things to consider when calling the cleaning company:
- Due to her child’s medical fragility, it might be difficult for a medical mom to feel comfortable allowing a new person into their home.
- They may have specific instructions about things that cannot be touched or moved.
- There might be only certain times that their home can be cleaned.
- Certain chemicals may need to be avoided.
- The staff may need to wear a mask and gloves.
#4 Give a Shopping Gift Card with Childcare
Getting outside the house for an afternoon with the freedom to buy something for herself can be a really nice treat for a disability mom.
Consider purchasing a gift card for a women’s clothing store. This way she can only spend the money on herself.
Some things to consider about providing childcare:
- It can be difficult to allow other people in the home due to their child’s medical fragility, challenging behaviors, or because she might be embarrassed about how messy their home is.
- There’s likely going to be very specific instructions. Just know that it’s not going to be like sitting with the average child.
- Their child might need a sitter with training for how to manage their developmental needs, disability, or behaviors.
- Their child may need in-home medical care, and it may be necessary to pay for a nurse for those hours the mom will be gone.
#3 Plan a Salon Trip with Childcare
The feeling of getting outside the house and doing something to care for ourselves can help boost our mood and self-esteem. Finances can sometimes keep us moms from going to the salon to get our hair colored and styled or enjoy a pedicure or manicure.
A gift card and scheduled childcare would encourage us to go.
#2 Schedule a Spa Day with Childcare
The times that I’ve gone to a spa for the day and gotten a massage have been incredible. The stress relief can have tremendous benefits for a special needs mom.
Spas and massages can be expensive. Consider going in with other people to buy the gift.
The pampering, relaxing scents, calming music, muscle soothing, and rest can rejuvenate her mind, emotions, body, and soul. Then, she can return home a healthier woman and mom.
#1 Give a Night Away with Childcare
And the ultimate gift you can give a special needs mom–a night away! She may want to stay really close by in case there’s an emergency. Oftentimes, my “self-cations” are just twenty minutes away from home and the hospital in case one of the kids needs to go to the ER.
Ah, quiet. No one to feed or care for except herself.
Research shows that just one night away can make a significant difference in a caregiver’s mental health. Lining up childcare and paying for the treat might take a group of people, but imagine how much it would mean to this mom.
What would be the ultimate gift someone could give you?
Make sure to share your dream gift in the comments below.
Blessings,
Kristin
Discover other ways you can support special needs parents.
Kristin Faith Evans, MA, MS, LMSW
Kristin is an author, a speaker, a mental health therapist, and a special needs mom. Her greatest passion is walking with others on their journey to deeper faith and mental health wholeness. As a Licensed Masters Social Worker and with her Masters in Christian Spiritual Formation, she has served in youth, camping, and retreat ministries and is experienced in Christian counseling, couples and family therapy, substance abuse treatment, and crisis counseling. Kristin lives with her husband, Todd, and their two children in the Nashville, TN area. When she is not enjoying life with her family, writing or working with clients, you can find Kristin training for triathlons, reading, or simply being out in nature. Visit her author website at www.KristinFaithEvans.com.
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